Bo Burnham – Sluts poem



Favorite poem

Sluts, sluts, I fuck sluts.
Sluts get fucked when I fuck sluts.
No if and’s, and or but’s. I fuck sluts.
I fuck sluts. Nice girls are nice but no good for nut-suckin,
You’ll need a serene night to green-light a butt fucking,
But that’ll be easy with sleazy old slut fucking.
Boo to the nice girls! Praise bae to slut fucking.
I have a list. A list? Yes a list of all the sluts I’ve missed.
I’ve never fucked or sucked these sluts and thus my nuts are fucking
Pissed.
So when I fuck the lucky slut my nut removes her from the list.
Another dumb cum-bucket struck from my nut sucking,
Suck it slut, sluck it fuck bucket-list…
Sluts can be white, black, brown, pink, or almond.
They can be skinny with big tits or skinny with small ones.
Sluts can be perky, preppy or posh with their brains and their clothes all
Shrunk from the wash.
But other girls are pretty and funny and smart.
And they lift all your thoughts from your dick to your heart.
They can talk about science, music, or art.
They can put you together or they can pull you apart.
But don’t trust these women, don’t, don’t you dare.
They’ll force you to trust them and love them and care.
And then they’ll be gone and then you’ll be aware of that hole in your heart
That that dumb slut left there

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Fahad Hameed

Fahad Hashmi is one of the known Software Engineer and blogger likes to blog about design resources. He is passionate about collecting the awe-inspiring design tools, to help designers.He blogs only for Designers & Photographers.

46 thoughts on “Bo Burnham – Sluts poem

  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    people are sexist arseholes to an entire gender when they get dumped pretty sure every woman on the planet already proved that

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    "They can be skinny with big tits or skinny with small ones"
    I feel like no one in the audience caught that but here I am cackling

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    Even in such an explicit, thoughtless poem, there can be deep messages. That is, as long as Bo Burnham wrote it.

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    That's how I'm gonna live my life from now on. "You'll need a serene night to greenlight a buttfucking."

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    Typical of an alt comic using practically all dirty material to be funny.

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    That went from "HAHAHA" to "Holy shit, i'm crying" really fucking fast.

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    Nice girls are nice
    But not good for nut sucking
    You'll need a serene night
    To green light
    A butt fucking
    But that'll be easy
    With sleeze old slut fucking
    Boo to the nice girls
    Praise'd be the slut fucking

    Reply
  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    This poem is so fucking sad jfc. When my girlfriend left me I legit memorized this poem

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    I HAVE A LIST! A LIST??? YES A LIST OF ALL THE SLUTS I'VE MISSED
    I NEVER FUCKED OR SUCKED THESE SLUTS AND THUS MY NUTS
    ARE FUCKING PISSED. BUT WHEN I FUCK THAT LUCKY SLUTS
    MY NUTS REMOVES HER FROM THE LIST… HAD ME IN TEARS, WAIT WAIT WAIT!!!

    ANOTHER DUMB CUM BUCKET STRUCK FROM MY NUT SUCKING SLUT BUTT FUCKING BUCKET LIST
    XDDD LOLOLOLOLOL. CANT STOP LAUGHING… XD LOLZ

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    Why even write the words in the description if you're just going to get a ton of them wrong?

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    LOL he messed up and he knew it. The poem doesn't make sense because he said but the other sluts instead of the other girls.

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  • August 27, 2017 at 9:18 am
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    "Look at the lyrics of popular songs, or read some classical poetry: the phrases we choose to describe romantic love don't really sound all that pleasant. Crazy in love, love hurts, obsession, heartbreak … these are all descriptions of mental or physical illness.The thing that gets called romantic love in this culture seems to be a heady cocktail of lust and adrenaline, sparked by uncertainty, insecurity, perhaps even anger or danger. The chills up the spine that we recognize as passion are, in fact, the same physical phenomenon as hair rising up on a cat's back and are caused by the fight-or-flight response. This kind of love can be thrilling and overwhelming and sometimes a hell of a lot of fun, but it is not the only "real" kind of love, nor is it always a good basis for an ongoing relationship. Yet as George Bernard Shaw famously remarked, "When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part.""
    ~ The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures

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