Social Anxiety Disorder – A Slam Poem



I’ve suffered from social anxiety my whole life, and in my process of trying to overcome it I thought it would be interesting to try and write a slam poem about it. Since slam poetry is a performance, generally in front of lots of people, and social anxiety pretty much prevents that from being a possibility, I thought I would face my fears and try to perform a slam poem about social anxiety disorder.

I wrote this poem about a year ago and finally have the courage to perform it – at least in front of a camera. I’ve made a lot of progress, and hopefully one day I’ll be able to perform this in front of a real audience. I hope you like it. (:

THE POEM:
My self-titled album plays like white noise
Too scratched to spin on any machine
Unheard and unseen
Look at me

I am a poet who can’t find my pen
Overwhelmed by my curse to rehearse verse by verse
A conversation immersed
In my mind
Imaginary, that’s never conversed
Over and over and over the words course through my beating corpse
And I build up the courage to flourish
But the courage warps
And it thwarts my thoughts
Until finally untimely
I break

Explosive eyeballs drop like bombs on my bullseyed face
Jagged hairs pop from my pale skin
Sweat wrings out my strangled heart
And I’m staring down a bullet in the barrel of a gun
And extracted I see myself
Outside myself
Suffocating

Blind naked and invaded by uncontrollable shaking
I absorb their words breaking
Taking me deeper and aching
Are you okay?
What’s wrong, why can’t you say?
It’s not that hard
You’re just afraid, you can’t be brave
It isn’t real or cute or pretty
You’re just a fake, a liar looking for our pity.

Do you have any idea how it feels to stand here before you?
Constantly terrified you’ll judge or laugh or disapprove?
Do you know how it feels to have your heart beat so hard that it hurts?
Ripped out by nothing but eyes?
I’d rather die than have your eyes untie
I abide in hiding, no seek
No receiving the trust you need to sneak a peek
I’m not an open book, don’t look, I’m locked
Blocked like a blood clot
Walked on by bodies overstocked with rot
So don’t talk to me about what’s in my thoughts
Ready or not here I

Stay

All I do is stay
Look away
What do I say?
My words spill uncaged on the page but in public are poison
Make my palms moisten
And I know if I can’t unlatch my lips at least I can listen
But the perks of being a wallflower are none

Withered in a cracked pot, no rain drops
I’m done
I don’t have guts
Maybe the alcohol will wash down and vomit some
Liquid courage, my unnatural spring
Burns on the way down but at least it feels like I’m existing

There’s a reason social anxiety disorder acronymizes to sad
S. A. D.
I couldn’t even say it in a spelling bee
Quelling bees buzzing like hell
Unshelling my skin, stinging my vocal chords so I can’t even fucking spell
Sad
S. A. D.
Sad

But I’m okay
I could go out in the sun and meet some friends out of my head
Or maybe I’ll just read a book instead

STALK ME:
FACEBOOK~ http://facebook.com/cozzaku
TWITTER~ @stephcozza
INSTAGRAM~ @stephcozza
TUMBLR~ http://cozzaku.tumblr.com

source

Fahad Hameed

Fahad Hashmi is one of the known Software Engineer and blogger likes to blog about design resources. He is passionate about collecting the awe-inspiring design tools, to help designers.He blogs only for Designers & Photographers.

40 thoughts on “Social Anxiety Disorder – A Slam Poem

  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    I'm so bummed, I feel like I came to the party so late, but still feel like commenting 🙂

    From the videos I've watched I never would have guessed you weren't always as charming and self confident as you appear. But really thank you for opening up and sharing, totally know where you're coming from.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    Hi there, have you considered Atoractove Secrets yet? Just simply do a google search. On there you will find a great guidelines about how you can completely erased your anxiety. Why don't you give it a chance? perhaps it'll work for you too.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    I don't know if im properly diagnosed by Social Anxiety but I hate social interactions. I mean,it is so hard for me to make a new friends outside school. I hate talking to people I don't know,heck I can't even start a conversation even if they start it,I don't know what to reply. I don't do well in presentaions unless there is my friends with me bcs I will feel uncomfortable and hard breathing.If im alone in public,my hands will shake,my heart will pound faster than it should and my eyes watered..I just need to find someone I know. I can't go to the casher to order food because I just can't.Im a afraid of them judging me and me humilitated myself.My mom always mad at me cause that.Can someone help?

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    Guys. completely eliminated your social anxiety doesn't need to be hard (I used to feel it did). I will give you some tips now. Get a popular anxiety secrets called Atoractove Secrets (search on google). Thanks to it I've eliminated my social anxiety problem for good by using natural and fast approaches. I shouldn't even be talking about it cause I do not really want a bunch of other guys out there running exactly the same game but whatever. I am just simply in a excellent mood today and so I'll share the wealth haha.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    Yeees you nailed it girl! OMG I have social anxiety and I can relate to this sooo much. What an amazing poem. Keep going♡ Love it 😉😉

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    You have no idea how much you have touched me with this poem. I can't help but sob because this relates to me so much, and I don't think anyone could ever word it as eloquently and beautifully as you just did. You need to keep writing poetry and sharing your talent with this world, because you have something so special that could and has touched so many souls. Thank you for writing from your experiences to help me and others understand our own.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    This covers the stages and feelings of anxiety very well. Love it.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    so I'm not the only one who uses reading as a coping mechanism! we SAD people are all the same in different ways.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    As expert, I believe Atoractove Secrets can be good way to stop your social anxiety naturally. Why don't you give it a shot? perhaps it's going to work for you too.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    It still surprise me, how some people are not
    aware about Atoractove Secrets (search on google), despite the fact
    that a lot of people completely eliminated their social anxiety problem
    with this system. Thanks to my cooworker who told me about Atoractove
    Secrets, I finally eliminated my social anxiety for good with natural
    and fast ways.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    Before I watched this video I got a ad on how to stop social Anxiety

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    I've always been shy but my social anxiety started and got worse after I was molested when I was 8 I was scared to talk to people,teachers, at age 15 I couldn't order my own food or go into places alone I go to a therpist and I'm prescribed medication I'm 18 and its taken me 10 years to finally have the courage to get a job and start talking I'm doing a lot better this poem was 👍

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    Anybody tried the Atoractove Secrets (just search it on google)? We have heard several awesome things about this popular social anxiety method.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    It still surprise me, just how a lot of people have no idea about Atoractove Secrets (do a search on google), even though many people completely eliminated their social anxiety problem with this program. Thanks to my mate who told me about Atoractove Secrets, I finally eliminated my social anxiety for good by using natural and fast approaches.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    Beautifully eloquent words, delivered with genuine passion, I loved it… thanks for sharing

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    I feel this on a personal level. This really hit home. You gotta do more stuff like this.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    Lol I accidentally clicked the unlike button and I freaked for a sec and clicked the like button but I ended up clicking it again like fak I love this lemme press the like button jesus

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    This means so much. Every fucking special snowflake who diagnoses themselves with S.A.D, for wanting to shove an Arctic Monkeys album up their ass at home instead of going to school, needs to see this.
    Stop using something that fucks up people's lives as a quirk. My disorder is not an adjective for your tumblr bio.

    Reply
  • September 4, 2017 at 11:10 am
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    wow. this is amazing. i struggled with this for most of my life untill i started taking some graduate courses in counseling and was forced to do uncomfortable things in social situations. It was required of me and i couldn't get out of it so essentially it was its own exposure therapy. S.A.D. is like you're trapped in your own body. And you wanna reach out but that fear of everyone watching you, judging you, thinking negatively about you can be all consuming. I wrote a poem about this too but i feel like you explained this so eloquently. I wish you the best. I hope you can find healing and happiness and self-fulfillment

    Reply

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